Some sort of propulsion of the massed human psyche pushes us further into darkness as a result of unquestioningly accepting societal reality as the ultimate truth, an unquestioned enigma of absolutes that tells us that we must spend almost eighteen years of our lives in a traditional classroom in order to become successful.

Where is this measure taken, for some reason a person's integrity is only measured by the caliber of the school that he or she went to and ultimately plays a role in whether or not they should be considered reputable.

It's this flaw in society that I wholeheartedly disagree with. It is why I have chosen the lifestyle that I have clinged to for over three years, it is why I have chosen the education path that I have. The fundamentals of our society are rotting away into obscurity. We've truly lost touch with our inner selves, we've become stiff, our bodies constantly scrutinized; tendrils of stress pour through us when we feel we are "too fat" or "too ugly," we've become brainwashed, we've replaced the deepest parts of our essential spiritual growth in greedy, mindwashing organizations that call themselves religions. We place all of our value in how much green paper we can put in a corporate bank. We a large majority of our lives into an overpriced "house" which is ultimately an insulated box of wood with carpeting where we spend a vast majority of our time fattening ourselves and continuing our own paranoid adventures through society, making "friends" with people who will ultimately have little impact on our lives, running on a treadmill for thirty minutes a day trying to secure in our minds that we are healthy and that we will not fall victim to our own laziness. We sit in front of computers and conform to social networking sites and "kill time" playing useless flash games on the internet saving some bizarre hope that for some reason doing this makes us more of a human being. We watch TV, we watch other people live their own lives based on this stigma and in turn we match our lifestyle to be exactly like theirs. Some beings go on to make a difference in the world, people like Albert Einstein, Michelangelo, Da Vinci, Galileo, Beethoven, Mother Teresa, Martin Luther and his King counterpart, John Lennon, and all other figures we hold with glowing affection. However how often will you ever become one of them? It's a lot like winning the lottery, but much of it has to do with visionaries who expand their consciousness beyond that of what society tells them they can or cannot do.

I am constantly a victim of this damn reality. The only eustresses I manage to secure in my life come in a time when there is no obligation to this blind ambition to superiority and monetary fruition. There have been countless days where I have felt empty, days where I've wasted away my time to this terrible concept of "mindless entertainment." I've eaten myself to gluttony, I've powered my ego through connecting relationships with people I care little about simply to better myself. I constantly am stressed about this largely unimportant enigma known as school, as well as my undying "need" to be a part of something.

Why do we do it? What is the price of "civilized society." Why not spend all this time doing things that waste so much time doing something ultimately worthwhile. I say there is nothing wrong with a person wanting to fulfill their own "destinies." Here is where my paradoxical statement comes: if a person wants to watch television for the rest of their lives, then let them do so. I have just berated society for having this form of entertainment being a necessity, but it has to be said that when a person believes so firmly in doing such a thing they should not be stopped; otherwise they're subject to "original sin."

If people are unhappy, then they must do what they feel they have to in order to become happy. That is all I wish for society to realize, to say anything else would truthfully be an extension of my own egotistical wishes. For some reason living in this conglomerate has become a necessity. I was taught in school that the only things a person needs to survive is shelter, food and water. That is not true, to live where I live you need money, you need respectability, you need sources for whatever reason you can possibly think of which entails, of course, communications; cell phones, television, computers are all a necessity nowadays. We're constantly plugged in, it might be a side affect of the "information age" but I feel with this new age of openness we're in danger of closing our minds to selective reasoning, choosing to believe only what agrees with ourselves; it's because of this day of automation that we find ourselves unable or unwilling to do the actual digging ourselves. It is no different than people being brainwashed in churches so many years ago during the dark ages or the inquisition, it may not be as violent but when we fall victim to the constructs of organized societal influences we often lose our ability to realize the beauty, sanctity, importance, value, of human life and often let others do the thinking for us because of our own fear of the Big Picture.

My wish is that people start viewing things from a critical perspective, in the environment I'm living in currently I see throes of people who have become consumed by their own ignorance, stupidity has become a large part of our society and it frightens me to see so many people who do not choose to stand up and express themselves. We've been taught to reserve ourselves to our own lives as long as we are virtuous to society, what should be taught is that we are allowed our own reality and we can make of it as we please. However that is just my opinion. So much paranoia and fear has become a part of our being, I believe it is a mass illness that is prompting war and intolerance and hate. The question begs "what is the point of our existence?" To me the question is broader than anyone can ever imagine; the answer is whatever you make of it. The only thing that humanity needs to understand is that seeing the bigger picture is far more important than seeing what is around us; it is my hope by the time that I die that there are more people who are among me that believe in the power of the human being through our gift of incredible knowledge we will be able to take the infinite step back to view a small portion of the true reality of this vast universe.

In death comes truth, I suppose.